Sitting at the DMV

"Three hours is a LONG TIME to spend staring at the back of someone's head."  ~ anonymous

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sunday evening, I sat down in front of my calendar to plan out my week.  It looked like Wednesday would be the "lucky day".

After an appointment in Fairfax, I would go (like the game of LIFE) directly to

                THE DEPARTMENT OF MOTOR VEHICLES.

I wrote it down in ink, so that I would not forget, and vowed not to come up with excuses not to go.

My day went, as planned.
I parked the car at the mall, just outside of JCPenney - the closest entrance to the DMV.

As I approached the long hallway, leading up to the "room", or what I like to refer to as the "human trap", I could already see the back of the line.

"Not good," I thought.

Whenever the line turns the corner, through the double doors, and out of sight, there is a good chance of being contained in there for HOURS.  

I took my place at the end of the line, and stood there, feeling like a "lab rat". 
The only difference was that I knew what was coming.    

When I reached the front, I presented the lady at the counter with my documentation.
She handed me a ticket with a number on it, as well as a form to fill out. 

I walked over to the table decorated with clipboards, and while I reached out to pick the perfect one, the security guard gave me the "suspicious look-over". 

          Maybe it was the temporary henna tattoo on my left forearm.


I grabbed the PERFECT clipboard, surveyed the rows and rows of DESIGNER chrome and plastic blue chairs, and found a suitable enough place to sit.  

With my lucky number at my side, I filled out the form.......................and waited. 

And waited, and waited, and waited, and waited, AND waited.

Tick, tock, tick.

Two designer blue chairs over, I noticed the ticket number started with the same letter. 

     "Apparently, you and I are soul mates," I commented (holding up my number), laughing at myself,
as that could have easily been interpreted as a pick up line.

He was much younger than I, and fortunately, had a sense of humor. 
He recognized that we were two victims, trying to find a way to pass the time, as well as ease our shared misery.

     "This is my second trip in two weeks," he said, "and the first time, I was here for THREE HOURS." 

     "Wow," I responded.  "Well, at least you brought a book."

     "I learned from last time," he said, smiling.  "Three hours is a LONG TIME to be staring at the back of someone's head." 

He paused and continued,

      ".....................and the worst of it is that I just signed a lease for an apartment in D.C., so I get to do this ALL OVER again!" 

     "OHhhhhh, I am SO sorry to hear that.  I am SURE that D.C.'s system is going to be MUCH more efficient," I commented (with sarcasm).   

Just then, the voice on the intercom called out my new friend's number. 

     "Good Luck!" he said....................walking away.   

                                                   Leaving me Behind.      

                                                                           To suffer.            

                                                                                        Alone.
 

     "Some soul mate HE turned out to be," I thought. 

Somewhere behind me, in the sea of blue chairs, someone was being serenaded with the "Happy Birthday" song, temporarily transporting me to a more joyful place.

After waiting two and a half hours, my number was finally called.

     "This is IT!" I celebrated.  I felt like jumping up in the air, like in that 1980's car commercial (see link below), long ago.   

I could see the ending in sight, as I preceded toward the counter with all of my paperwork.

     "I will be right back," said the DMV employee, after looking over my paperwork.

     "THAT IS NOT A GOOD SIGN," I thought.

She came back quickly, and handed me another form.

     "Here," she said, "You need to take this home and fill it out,

               T -  H -  E -  N         C -  O -  M -  E          B -  A - C - K."

Her words were like confusing background noise in my head.  They came out in slow motion, and seemed to come from way in the back of her throat, out of a loooooong, dark corridor. 

I stood there staring at her, in disbelief. 

"I CAN SEE YOUR LIPS MOVING, BUT I CAN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU ARE SAYING ! ! !"
 (is what I was thinking). 

In a bit of a daze, I turned around and walked out.  I was tired, frustrated, and hungry.

Feeling the pain of my DMV soul mate, I said to myself,

     "Yep.  Two and a half hours is a LONG TIME to be staring at the back of someone's head.  Guess I need to find myself a good book,"

                      and I took my henna tattoo clad self...................in search of some food. 

                            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgoTXkXqxbA









 

Random Thoughts, Moments, and Observations, All Upon a Rainy Monday.............

De Ja Vu

Brushing my teeth, this morning, I thought to myself, "Wait a minute.  Didn't I JUST do this?"

While it had been six hours, it seemed like just 5 minutes ago.

Milk

My 11 year old insisted that I have a talk with my 16 year old about her new hobby -
                writing the grocery list on the sliding glass door with a dry erase marker.

I, who actually see it as a brilliantly creative use of space (aside from a fingerprint collecting device) said,

      " There are way too many things to be stressed out about, and that's not one of them. "

Then, I picked up the dry erase marker and wrote the word "milk" on the glass door.

The Smell of Coffee

My 11 year old walked in the kitchen and said,

" Something smells like a skunk!"

A few seconds later............................

"Oh.  It's your coffee." 

Personally, I always thought it smelled a bit like..........................pot. 

 Stuck?

Ever feel like life just has you feeling..........................STUCK ? 

And depending on the size of the wad of gum that your shoe is stuck to, you could be stuck for a REALLY LONG time. 

You pull and pull to try to break free, but no matter how hard you try, you just stand there....................STUCK!

Until you finally get smart enough,

                        and pull your foot out of the shoe. 

Fried Fish

Don't be fooled! 

Even if the menu at the Chinese restaurant says you have a CHOICE of either STEAMED fish

or FRIED fish, what it really means is that you have a choice between

FRIED fish................
                               
                        and FRIED fish.

So, would you like your fish fried ? ? ?

I'm BACK!

EXPECT MORE................................. !!!!!!

                                     stories,

         life observations,

                                      thoughts,

              and comments...............

                             ON MY BLOG this week. 

My blog problems appear to be resolved !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Working on it!

Working out the glitches, but I am getting closer......................I think???

Experiencing Technical Difficulties

I am experiencing technical difficulties on my blog!  Hopefully, it won't last long.  Please stay tuned!

"Monday, In Disguise"

     Yesterday, I walked into a Whole Foods where, throughout the aisles of
organic produce, grass fed beef, and  holistic vitamins,
there could be heard the lovely sounds of a vocalist,
accompanied by an acoustic guitar.              

     At first, I thought,
"I am really impressed by the clarity of the speakers in this place,"
and then, as I was standing in the self check-out line,

I realized the music was LIVE.

There, in the corner of the store,
just beyond the grocery carts and the
reusable, cloth grocery bags, was the vocalist,

singing and strumming away on the strings of her guitar.

THEN, I thought,

"This doesn't FEEL like a Monday.  Did I mistakenly send the kids to school on a Saturday?"

                                                                                                                                                                      

Missing "Back to School Night"

My name is Leslie, and I missed two Back to School Nights this week.

There.

 I said it.

(sigh of relief)

That may sound silly to you, but there is this notion (as a mom), that if you do not attend every one of your child's school functions...................you are a bad parent.   

Do I feel that way about myself? 

Absolutely not, but it has taken me some time to get to that point where I can say,
              
                     "It's ok.  I'm doing the best that I can.  It's ok."

Besides, if I were to tally up all of the Back to School Nights (including preschool)  that I have attended over the last thirteen years,  I think my record would speak for itself. 

That being said, I don't think my kids are going to look back on their childhood and say,

     "I remember that mom went to every school function there ever was." 

At the same time, I don't think they will remember the ones that I missed.  

As it turns out, I missed the first one because of a conflicting appointment, and I knew that I would have ample opportunities to meet my child's teacher, in the near future.   

I missed the second one because, due to the unfolding of events during that week, I felt that my presence was much more valued sitting across the dinner table from my sixteen year old daughter, than it would have been meeting her teachers at Back to School night. 

I learned more about her during our dinner conversation, than I would have, sitting in a classroom full of parents.

She and I BOTH needed that time.   

Hopefully, my kids will remember times like these, for more important than attending school functions, is being present for your children.........................when they need you. 

My name is Leslie, and I missed two Back to School nights this week....................

but I had the most wonderful dinner with my daughter.