"Neuter - to remove the testicles or ovaries of an animal." (Encarta Dictionary)
I was standing in my kitchen the other day, suddenly finding myself in the month of June. With school winding down, my thoughts were shifting toward those upcoming summer projects - you know, the ones that you put off until summer, because you think THAT is when you will have the time to do them?
Unfortunately, for my dog, Charlie, one of those projects involves taking away his "manhood", otherwise known as getting him neutered or, as some like to refer to it -
As if he were reading my mind, my youngest son walked into the room and asked,
"Did Charlie get his 'you know what', yet?"
"Funny you should ask! I was just thinking about that," I responded. "Not yet."
"Can I give it to him, then?" he inquired.
"What???" I asked.
WE MUST NOT BE TALKING ABOUT THE SAME THING
"You know," he said. "Can I give him his T - R - E - A - T ?"
I laughed. I LAUGHED, and I laughed.
"I thought you were talking about something else," I responded. "I already gave him his T - R - E - A - T."
"What did you think I was talking about?" he asked.
"You know," I said. "Snip, snip."
"Ohhh!" he said. "Well, he does need that, too, but maybe wait awhile. I like it when it's a little bit longer."
"HUHHH????" I asked.
I HAVE A FEELING WE ARE NOT TALKING ABOUT THE SAME THING
"I like it when it's longer, especially around his eyes," he announced.
When I realized that he was talking about a haircut, I laughed.
I LAUGHED, and I LAUGHED...........................................and I laughed.
"What's so funny this time???" he asked.
"That's not the kind of 'snip, snip' I was referring to. I was talking about getting him neutered," I explained.
"Ohhhh," he said. "OOOHHHHhhhhhhhhhh!"
As the humor of the conversation caught up to him, suddenly, the only one NOT laughing.........................................was the dog.